11 Lessons from Terminally Ill Kids on What Matters Most

A Cape Town pediatrician, Dr. Alastair McAlpine, has shared profound wisdom from terminally ill children that transcends their years, offering insights that could transform how we view life’s true priorities.

These young souls, facing life’s greatest challenge, demonstrate an extraordinary understanding of what truly matters – from the simple joy of ice cream to the deep comfort of family bonds.

Their 11 perspectives, gathered through thoughtful conversations in palliative care, share a striking clarity about life’s essentials that many adults spend decades trying to discover. 

1. Nobody wishes they’d spent more time online

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Terminally ill children consistently express that real-world connections matter infinitely more than virtual ones.

They cherish memories of playing outside, feeling the sun on their faces, and having actual conversations with friends and family. These experiences bring them genuine happiness and comfort.

Physical interactions and tangible experiences create lasting impressions that no amount of screen time can replace. 

Many children mention regretting time spent on devices when they could have made real memories with loved ones.

2. Animals make human lives better

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The presence of pets provides extraordinary comfort and unconditional love to children facing terminal illness. These faithful companions offer constant support, never judge, and bring moments of pure joy even during difficult treatments.

Animals have a unique ability to sense when children need extra comfort, providing emotional support that sometimes even humans cannot match. 

Many children express that their pets helped them feel less alone and gave them something to look forward to daily.

3. They love their parents

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Children facing terminal illness consistently emphasize the profound importance of their relationship with their parents. They express deep gratitude for their parents’ presence, care, and unwavering support throughout their journey.

The parent-child bond becomes even more significant during illness, with children appreciating simple moments like being held, reading stories, or having their parents nearby. 

They often worry about their parent’s well-being and want to ensure their parents know how much they are loved.

4. Ice cream, duh

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Simple pleasures like ice cream bring immense joy to terminally ill children. These small indulgences become meaningful moments that help them feel normal and bring happiness during difficult times.

The joy of eating their favorite treats reminds these children that even in illness, there are still sweet moments to savor. 

It’s not about the ice cream itself, but rather about the happiness and normalcy, these simple pleasures represent.

5. Reading makes a big difference

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Books provide crucial escape and comfort for terminally ill children. Stories transport them beyond hospital walls and allow their imaginations to soar freely, even when their bodies cannot.

Reading allows these young patients to process their experiences through different perspectives and narratives. 

Many children find solace in stories of courage and adventure, using them as sources of strength during their challenging journey.

6. Worrying is a waste of time

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These young patients demonstrate remarkable clarity about the futility of worry and anxiety.

Many express that they’d spent less time concerned about what others thought of them or their appearance.

Children with terminal illnesses often show remarkable resilience and acceptance, teaching us that precious moments shouldn’t be wasted on unnecessary concerns.

7. Everyone loves the beach!

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The simple joy of feeling sand between their toes and hearing waves crash against the shore ranks among the most cherished memories for these children. 

Swimming and playing on the beach consistently emerge as favorite activities that bring pure happiness. Natural experiences create lasting impressions that no amount of artificial entertainment can replace. 

These children remind us that connecting with nature offers profound comfort and joy.

8. Kindness matters

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Almost all children emphasized the importance of kindness above other virtues. They particularly remember and value those who showed them gentleness and compassion during difficult times.

Simple acts of kindness leave lasting impressions on these young patients, from nurses who are extra gentle during procedures to friends who share their lunch.

9. Laughter is the best medicine

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Humor plays a crucial role in helping these children cope with their circumstances. They particularly value people who can make them laugh and bring light to their days.

Finding joy and humor even in difficult situations proves therapeutic, with many children treasuring memories of silly moments and funny incidents.

10. Kids love their toys

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These children find comfort and joy in their favorite toys and fictional heroes despite their circumstances. From teddy bears to action figures, these items provide comfort and entertainment.

These cherished possessions help maintain a sense of normalcy and provide emotional support during challenging times.

11. Family time is the best time

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Above all else, these children value moments spent with family. The presence of parents, siblings, and other family members provides irreplaceable comfort and meaning.

Quality time with family creates lasting memories that sustain the children and their loved ones. 

These moments of connection prove more valuable than any material possession or achievement.

Source:

  1. USA Today
Nancy Maffia » nancy
Nancy Maffia
Author & Editor | + posts

Nancy received a bachelor’s in biology from Elmira College and a master’s degree in horticulture and communications from the University of Kentucky. Worked in plant taxonomy at the University of Florida and the L. H. Bailey Hortorium at Cornell University, and wrote and edited gardening books at Rodale Press in Emmaus, PA. Her interests are plant identification, gardening, hiking, and reading.