16 Struggles of Living the Single Life

The landscape of relationships is changing, with more adults embracing single life than ever before. Around 38% of U.S. adults are now unpartnered, up from 29% in 1990, according to the Pew Research Center.¹

While freedom and independence can be exhilarating, the journey isn’t always smooth. As the number of singles continues to rise, it’s crucial to examine the realities of solo living.

Here are the 16 most challenging aspects of single life.

1. Combating Loneliness

Loneliness is often the elephant in the room for singles. It’s that gnawing feeling that creeps in during quiet evenings or festive holidays.

Studies have shown that chronic loneliness can increase the risk of premature mortality by a staggering 26%. (ref)

But it’s not just about having people around; it’s about meaningful connections. Singles may find themselves surrounded by friends and family, yet still feel a deep sense of isolation.

This disconnect can lead to a range of mental health issues, including depression and anxiety.

2. Navigating Social Pressures

Society often views singlehood as a temporary state, leading to constant questioning about relationship status.

This pressure can come from well-meaning family members, friends, or even strangers. It’s the dreaded “Why are you still single?” at every gathering.

These expectations can create a sense of inadequacy or failure among singles. The constant need to justify one’s single status can be exhausting and may even push some into relationships they’re not ready for, just to appease others.

3. Financial Strain

Living on a single income in a world designed for couples can be financially challenging. From housing costs to everyday expenses, singles often bear the full brunt of financial responsibilities. There’s no partner to split the rent or utilities with.

This financial pressure can limit lifestyle choices and make it harder to save for the future. Singles may find themselves working longer hours or taking on additional jobs to make ends meet, potentially impacting their quality of life and personal time.

4. Lack of Emotional Support

Having a partner often means having a built-in support system. For singles, finding that level of emotional support can be challenging. When life throws curveballs, there’s no guaranteed shoulder to lean on.

This lack of consistent emotional support can lead to feelings of vulnerability and isolation. Singles may find it harder to process difficult emotions or navigate challenging life events without a partner to share the burden.

5. Dealing with Self-Doubt

Extended periods of singlehood can sometimes lead to questioning one’s self-worth. It’s easy to fall into the trap of wondering, “Is there something wrong with me?”

This self-doubt can erode confidence and self-esteem over time.

Constant exposure to coupled friends and media portrayals of happy relationships can exacerbate these feelings. Singles might start to internalize the idea that being in a relationship is the norm, leading to a sense of inadequacy or incompleteness.

6. Navigating the Dating Scene

For those looking to change their single status, the modern dating landscape can be a minefield.

From dating apps to social events, putting yourself out there requires courage and resilience. Rejection becomes a frequent companion.

The sheer number of options in today’s dating world can be overwhelming. Singles may find themselves caught in a cycle of endless first dates, struggling to form meaningful connections in a culture of instant gratification and swipe-right mentality.

7. Handling Physical Intimacy Needs

Physical intimacy is a basic human need, and its absence can be challenging for singles. The lack of regular physical affection, from hugs to sexual intimacy, can impact both physical and mental well-being.

While casual encounters are an option for some, they don’t fulfill the deeper need for consistent, meaningful physical connection.

This can lead to feelings of touch starvation, or, conversely, engaging in unfulfilling physical relationships just to meet this basic need.

8. Planning for the Future

Single individuals often face unique challenges when planning for their future. From retirement planning to healthcare decisions, the absence of a partner can make long-term planning feel daunting and uncertain.

Questions like “Who will take care of me when I’m older?” can weigh heavily on singles’ minds.

The lack of a built-in support system for the future can lead to anxiety and the need for more meticulous planning in areas like finances and healthcare.

9. Balancing Independence & Companionship

While independence is often touted as a benefit of a single life, striking the right balance can be tricky. Too much self-reliance can lead to isolation, while constantly seeking companionship might compromise personal boundaries.

Singles may find themselves oscillating between cherishing their freedom and craving deeper connections. This balancing act requires constant self-reflection and adjustment, which can be emotionally taxing.

10. Coping with Holiday Blues

Holidays and special occasions can be particularly challenging for singles. These times often emphasize coupledom and family units, leaving singles feeling left out or incomplete.

The contrast between festive cheer and personal loneliness can be stark.

From Valentine’s Day to New Year’s Eve, singles may find themselves grappling with heightened emotions. The pressure to find a date for events or explain one’s single status to relatives can turn joyous occasions into sources of stress and anxiety.

11. Maintaining a Social Life

As friends couple up and start families, singles may find their social circles shrinking.

Organizing outings or maintaining friendships can become more challenging as priorities shift. The fear of being the “third wheel” is real and often leads to self-isolation.

Singles might need to put in extra effort to maintain and expand their social networks. This can involve stepping out of comfort zones, joining new groups, or initiating gatherings, which can be emotionally draining for some.

12. Dealing with Stereotypes & Stigma

Society often attaches negative stereotypes to single individuals, especially as they age. From being seen as commitment-phobic to being pitied, these stereotypes can be frustrating and hurtful.

Singles may find themselves constantly battling these preconceptions.

The stigma around singlehood can impact various aspects of life, from social interactions to professional opportunities. Singles might feel pressure to conform to societal expectations or constantly justify their lifestyle choices.

13. Managing Household Responsibilities Solo

From home repairs to daily chores, singles bear the full weight of household management. There’s no division of labor, which can be overwhelming and time-consuming. Every task, big or small, falls squarely on their shoulders.

This constant responsibility can lead to burnout and leave little time for personal pursuits or relaxation. Singles may find themselves sacrificing personal time or social activities to keep up with the demands of solo household management.

14. Navigating Career Challenges

In some workplaces, singles may face unique career challenges. They might be expected to work longer hours or take on more travel, based on the assumption that they have fewer personal commitments. This can lead to an imbalanced work-life dynamic.

Additionally, networking and career advancement can sometimes favor those in relationships, as social events and business dinners often cater to couples. Singles may need to work harder to create professional connections and opportunities.

15. Handling Health & Emergencies

During health crises or emergencies, the absence of a partner can be acutely felt. From having someone to drive you to the hospital to making medical decisions, singles often lack an immediate support system in critical situations.

This vulnerability can lead to increased anxiety about health and safety. Singles may need to be more proactive in creating emergency plans and building a network of friends or family who can step in during crises.

16. Embracing Self-Discovery & Growth

While not inherently negative, the journey of self-discovery as a single person can be challenging. Without the mirror of a romantic relationship, individuals must work harder to understand themselves, their needs, and their personal growth areas.

This constant self-reflection and personal development can be both rewarding and exhausting. Singles may find themselves on an intense journey of self-improvement, which, while ultimately beneficial, can be emotionally and mentally demanding.

Whether you’re embracing singlehood or seeking a partner, understanding these challenges can lead to better self-awareness and more fulfilling relationships – with others and, most importantly, with yourself.

Remember, being single isn’t a waiting room for life; it’s a valid and potentially rewarding lifestyle choice in its own right.

Source:

1. Pew Research Center