5 Things I Had To Learn On My Own Because I Grew Up In A Deeply Codependent Family Dynamic

The intricate dynamics of families can foster codependency, molding self-perception and relationships.

In the quest to sustain connections, codependents often forsake personal needs, resulting in self-neglect.

This brews feelings of inadequacy and fuels an insatiable hunger for external validation, perpetuating an endless loop of emotional reliance.

1. Self-Abandonment and Perceptions

self abandonment dp170996632
Image Credit: MitaStockImages/Deposit Photos.

“Trying to control other people’s perception of you is not only a form of self-abandonment, it’s actually a form of manipulation because you’re not showing them your real self. You’re a big old faker.”

Hiding our true selves and presenting a false image, we are being inauthentic and manipulative.

This can hinder genuine and meaningful connections with others, as people may not honestly know or understand who we are.

Instead of trying to manipulate others’ perceptions, we should embrace authenticity and be true to ourselves.

Being genuine allows for more authentic relationships, where people can connect on a deeper level and build trust.

It also fosters self-acceptance and self-love, leading to a healthier sense of identity and stronger emotional well-being.

2. Rethinking Manipulation

manipulation dp263994942
Image Credit: AndreyPopov/Deposit Photos.

“Being manipulative is not an objectively bad thing. You know who’s manipulative? Therapists, and they are good at it. It was actually one of my therapists that convinced me of that.”

Surprisingly, the conventional belief is that manipulation is inherently negative by highlighting how therapists use it constructively in their practice.

This perspective encourages us to rethink our preconceived judgments about manipulation.

Therapists leverage manipulation as a skillful tool to foster growth and healing among their clients, guiding them toward self-improvement through empathy and communication.

This positive application of manipulation can lead to beneficial outcomes in various aspects of life, offering new possibilities in problem-solving and negotiation.

Understanding the ethical use of manipulation allows us to navigate interactions and endeavors thoughtfully, fostering positive results for ourselves and others.

3. Letting Go of Others’ Problems

letting go dp21100157
Image Credit: mjth/Deposit Photos.

“Spending time solving other people’s problems for them in your mind is trying to control something that’s literally none of your business.”

The habit of mentally solving other people’s problems without their consent or involvement is an attempt to exert control over matters that are not within our purview.

Engaging in such behavior can lead to neglecting our own well-being and boundaries, fostering a cycle of codependency.

It’s crucial to recognize that some issues are best left to the individuals directly involved, and intervening uninvited can be intrusive and counterproductive.

Respecting others’ autonomy and allowing them the space to handle their own challenges empowers both parties to grow and learn from their experiences.

Redirecting our energy towards self-improvement and supporting others when asked for assistance can lead to healthier relationships and personal development.

4. Narcissism and Constant Self-Doubt

woman narcisism dp170760422
Image Credit:nicoletaionescu/Deposit Photos.

“Constantly wondering whether people hate you or not is a form of narcissism.”

Constantly wondering whether people harbor feelings of hatred towards us can indeed be linked to narcissism.

This perspective urges us to self-reflect and acknowledge that our insecurities may be connected to an excessive preoccupation with our self-image.

Such constant concern about how others perceive us may stem from an underlying need for validation and an overemphasis on our own importance.

5. Empath Identity and Enmeshment Trauma

Empathy dp361742784
Image Credit: SeventyFour/SeventyFour.

“When someone self-identifies as an empath, usually they have unresolved enmeshment trauma.”

The act of self-identifying as an empath often reveals a connection to unresolved enmeshment trauma.

Empaths, known for their heightened sensitivity to others’ emotions, may encounter difficulties rooted in their codependent upbringing.

This insight prompts us to examine the intricacies of our emotional bonds and how past experiences can shape our present perceptions.

By understanding the potential impact of enmeshment trauma, we can work towards healing and setting healthier boundaries in our relationships.

This awareness empowers us to navigate our empathic abilities more balanced and emotionally resiliently, fostering personal growth and stronger connections with others.

Viewer’s Perceptions and Insights

5 Things I Had To Learn On My Own Because I Grew Up In A Deeply Codependent Family Dynamic
Image Credit: TikTok/@rachaels.shadowwork.

This provides a compelling journey through the world of codependency, self-perception, and manipulation. These insightful revelations challenge conventional beliefs and offer fresh perspectives on human behavior.

Understanding the impact of codependent family dynamics can inspire us to embark on a journey of self-discovery and foster healthier relationships based on authenticity and genuine connections.

One comment reads, “I was today years old when I learned my fear that maybe I’m a narcissist was true all along!!”

Another one also shared their insights: “Therapy manipulation isn’t a bad thing when done ethically, it’s kinda the whole point of therapy; getting you where you could go on your own!”

A third added, “I disagree with #4. I think it’s a form of self-protection”

The Overthinker’s Dilemma: 7 Clues to Recognize the Habit

woman stressed dp365623738
Image Credit: eldarnurkovic/Deposit Photos.

Have you ever met someone who seems lost in their thoughts, analyzing every decision and contemplating every possible outcome?

Well, chances are, you’ve encountered an overthinker!

These individuals have a unique way of navigating the world, constantly caught in the web of their thoughts.

Inspired by a video with 2.6 million views, we will dive deep into the overthinker’s minds, exploring their quirks, struggles, and the fascinating world they inhabit.

10 Powerful Psychological Tricks to Master Your Social Interactions

business people dp358562726
Photo Credit: Deposit Photos.

Are you ready to enhance your social interactions and boost your confidence? Here are 10 powerful psychological tricks that can help you navigate the complexities of human interaction.

These tricks are not just theoretical concepts, but practical tools that you can start applying today to see immediate improvements in your social life.


sources 1 2


This article was produced and syndicated by Viral Chatter. It was inspired by this video:

@rachaels.shadowwork i already lost count of these #shadowwork #codependencyrecovery #enmeshedfamilies #traumatok #thoughtworktiktok ♬ Wii – Mii Channel – Super Guitar Bros

Martha A. Lavallie
Martha A. Lavallie
Author & Editor | + posts

Martha is a journalist with close to a decade of experience in uncovering and reporting on the most compelling stories of our time. Passionate about staying ahead of the curve, she specializes in shedding light on trending topics and captivating global narratives. Her insightful articles have garnered acclaim, making her a trusted voice in today's dynamic media landscape.