Weddings are one of the most memorable events that can happen in someone’s life. Whether it is good or bad, it will become a memory nevertheless.
For one wedding guest, however, her sister’s wedding, despite not being able to attend, became one memory that she may not look back on fondly.
The OP (original poster) begins by saying she was invited as a regular guest, which she was okay with. She understood she was not a bridesmaid or a maid of honor because she lived far away. She would not be able to fulfill the duties that those roles may require.
She’s still happy to attend the wedding and be there for her sister. The problem is it was a child-free wedding. This means that she cannot take her six-year-old son with her. The OP is a single mother, so she’d have to hire someone to babysit her son for at least two days.
Bride Gets Mad and Tells Her Off
The OP tried to ask if the bride could make an exception for her son. She explained her situation to her sister, but she was told that the no-children policy is strict. She tried again to tell her sister that she couldn’t leave her son alone so she would need someone to care for her son.
When she asked if the bride would be willing to pay for a nanny or a babysitter, she got offended. The OP said that her sister told her “children and weddings are both parts of life” and that she needs to “just figure it out, it’s my kid, my problem.”
The OP completely agrees with her sister’s statement, however, she also thinks it’s “her wedding, her making it a problem by not allowing me to bring my kid.” She then says that the only options are either her sister pays for child care or she will not attend the wedding.
The bride thinks it’s ridiculous to pay for her sister’s child care and that she’s entitled to even ask. She’s firm in her statement that being an adult means she should know how to handle situations like this.
Now, the OP thinks her sister is the one being ridiculous. She said that “Money is tight. Child care is expensive. I can’t magically afford for someone to watch my 6-year-old, and most people would just let me bring him to the wedding.”
The bride didn’t change her mind, and now their family is mad at the OP for “not being there for my sister.”
In an edit, the OP clarified that she didn’t make any demands. She was okay with not attending the wedding, and the bride accepted it. Her issue was that the bride purposely made her the bad guy in the situation. Apparently, she made it look like the OP wasn’t attending because she was purposely avoiding it.
Even with her explanation though, other people seem to think she was out of line for even asking the bride to pay for child care. “Don’t ask for handouts from a stressed-out bride. That’s where the entitlement came from.”
On the other hand, they also think the bride was in the wrong for complaining about her sister not attending the wedding. “Sister also has no right to be angry at her sister for not coming. She can choose to have a childfree wedding, but she cannot demand that people with children attend.”
Some Redditors think, “Asking a bride a state away, your sister of all people, to pay for childcare for a night or two so you can attend their special event, is not unreasonable at all.”
The situation may have resulted from a misunderstanding on both sides. Redditors think it became a blame game on who is at fault that the OP couldn’t attend the wedding.
Source: Reddit
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Martha A. Lavallie
Martha is a journalist with close to a decade of experience in uncovering and reporting on the most compelling stories of our time. Passionate about staying ahead of the curve, she specializes in shedding light on trending topics and captivating global narratives. Her insightful articles have garnered acclaim, making her a trusted voice in today's dynamic media landscape.