Wife With Cancer Asks for Divorce Because “He Is a Man”, Now Wants to Get Back Together

A heartbroken man on Reddit seeks advice from the community about whether or not to get back together with his ex-wife, who divorced him because of cancer.

The man said he and his wife met during their first year in college. They were together from then on and got married after the wife graduated. 

The young couple was happy with their life together, for a while, at least. Then, the wife discovered a lump on her right breast and was hesitant to have it checked despite the husband advising her to do so. 

She feared discovering the truth, especially since it runs in their family. When she finally took his advice, her nightmare turned into reality.

The silver lining is that the cancer was “extremely treatable with chemo and radiation.” But still, cancer is cancer. And the disease has really affected her well-being.

The man then suggested that his wife undergo therapy, but she refused and didn’t want to discuss it again. So as a supportive husband, he did everything he could to care for her and make her comfortable throughout this challenging time.

He drove with her to her appointments, did all the household chores and the shopping, gave hour-long massages, and even planned dates.

When the wife said she would stay with her sister for a week, he felt relieved that he could rest for a while. Taking care of his wife and doing everything he could for her burned him out, and he thought that one week apart would do them some good.

Wife Wants to Leave Husband Because “He Is a Man”

After a few days, his wife decided to divorce him. 

Her reason: “She had read a lot about men who abandon their wives when their wives get sick, and that she was determined to leave me before I could leave her.”

Of course, the man was devastated. However, he truly loved his wife and assured her he never considered leaving her. 

He tried everything he could. He suggested therapy, couple’s therapy, anything, but the wife refused. She said that there was nothing he could do to change her mind. She reasoned, “I am a man therefore I would leave. End of story.”

A year later and the divorce was finalized. The couple sold their house and split the proceeds. He moved away and dealt with his heartbreak.

Then, all of a sudden, his ex-wife returns and wants to get back together. She says that when she saw him when she was on a trip, “All of her feelings rushed back.”

“She said she was sick and out of her mind at the time, and that I couldn’t hold her words or her actions against her. She said she still loved me, that she always had, and that she regretted leaving me. She begged me to give her another chance.”

The man was doing okay, going on dates, hiking, and gardening. But now, he’s confused. He says he still loves his wife but is no longer in love with her. But with their history, he has no clue what to do.

Redditors Strongly Advised They Seek Therapy

Most readers agree that they need therapy before starting things again. They said that “Cancer was not the problem, (Lack of) communication, trust, and a willingness to compromise was (on her end). She made unilateral decisions without caring how it affected you.”

A commenter, who was also a breast cancer survivor, empathized with the wife, saying, “I realize I had to basically shut down and just focus on getting through appointments and surgeries and surviving. Then, I started therapy almost years after my last treatment and have been processing the trauma ever since. I just encourage others to consider how really, truly difficult this is.”

Source: Reddit